Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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