2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize