You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize