are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
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Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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