i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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