North Korea, Best Korea!
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize