i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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