i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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