420 ftw
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
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