You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Randomize