Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
