Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
