I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
honey bunches of taint.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.