And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
