at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
