oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
This is sufficient.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
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Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
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I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it