Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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