She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
tell me about the eggs
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