I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
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was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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