im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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