I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
