she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake