the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐