somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize