Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Boobs speak an international language.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
