How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I need a beard to bite.