I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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