So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.