Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
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He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
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And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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