So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?