my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.