i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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