waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
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I need you to use more vowels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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