in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK