I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.