So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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