Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
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Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
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If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?