I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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