I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
