I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize