Welp...herpes.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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