Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.

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  (248): Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick. http://tfl.nu/6zdd
  Replies (16) Good night (1541) Bad night (402) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I'll bet she douches with gravy.

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  (937): I'll bet she douches with gravy. http://tfl.nu/j4az
  Replies (6) Good night (541) Bad night (3045) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...

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  (612): new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself... http://tfl.nu/71kr
  Replies (35) Good night (1539) Bad night (6499) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle

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  (314): just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle http://tfl.nu/572m
  Replies (9) Good night (5033) Bad night (673) Order T-Shirt
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes

  (905): View more from Ontario

  You're fat. Stop making excuses

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  (647): all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes (905): You're fat. Stop making excuses http://tfl.nu/rdmk
  Replies (70) Good night (13021) Bad night (5283)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms

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  (503): And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms http://tfl.nu/1av4
  Replies (7) Good night (2299) Bad night (670) Order T-Shirt
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.

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  (641): My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning. http://tfl.nu/bmvl
  Replies (8) Good night (2148) Bad night (843) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  ... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.

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  (419): ... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette. http://tfl.nu/oqik
  Replies (15) Good night (3039) Bad night (758) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom

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  (530): sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom http://tfl.nu/p21d
  Replies (29) Good night (2123) Bad night (443) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I feel like death gave me a hand job

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  (505): I feel like death gave me a hand job http://tfl.nu/81uy
  Replies (12) Good night (466) Bad night (1459) Order T-Shirt
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV

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  (478): IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV http://tfl.nu/p33s
  Replies (3) Good night (399) Bad night (1300) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?

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  (404): When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012? http://tfl.nu/cat9
  Replies (12) Good night (1548) Bad night (512)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.

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  (865): I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night. http://tfl.nu/z7o8
  Replies (8) Good night (921) Bad night (239)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.

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  (845): I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel. http://tfl.nu/cl86
  Replies (3) Good night (607) Bad night (154) Order T-Shirt
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck

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  (515): We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place (1-515): I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck http://tfl.nu/93u8
  Replies (2) Good night (400) Bad night (114)

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