at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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