Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight