we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
