i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize