My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize