Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
