Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize