It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I deserve this hangover.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you