ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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